In laws during wedding planning

Wedding planning can drive even the most reasonable person a little loco at times. When it is your BFF, it is easy to pull them back into line. But when it is your future mother-in-law or even your own mother who is playing up, things can get a bit tricky.

The future in-laws are a very important part of your partner’s past and present and they will become an important part of your future, so it is best to try and handle any problems or conflict of ideas or personalities with as much composure and grace as you can.

Likewise with your own parents. You may not have always seen eye-to-eye while you were growing up, but your wedding is the last moment in your life when you want to let any strain come between you.

We have looked at a few of the most common differences of opinion that arise between brides-to-be, their parents and the future in-laws and have come up with some suggestions on how to diffuse the situation without hurting too many feelings (and still getting most of what you want…).


How to handle the parents and in-laws during wedding planning


Your mother in-law wants you to wear her dress

If this suggestion, or more forceful expectation, had come from your own mother and she has a sense of humour, you could easily say you would rather not wear a puffy-sleeved ’80s tulle-fest.

But if there is a dress that has been in the family for generations, it can be a little harder to pull the plug on the idea.

Likewise, if your future MIL never had a daughter, she might feel like you are one of her own and want to bestow the honour of passing her dress on to you.

In both of theses cases, you will need to employ a little more tact and rather than detracting from the look or age of her gown, which will still have a  lot of sentimental value for her, thank her kindly for the offer.

You might choose to say then and there that you would like to buy something that would suit a particular style you had in mind for your wedding, or you may have already found the gown of your dreams and you could offer to take her to a fitting so she can see it for herself. When she sees how happy you are in the gown and how stunning it is on you, she might change her tune.

If she is still insistent on you wearing the dress or balks at what you have chosen, you can politely say that this is what you would like to wear on your big day.